Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Excuses, Excuses!

I can find any excuse not to go out and run. For me, making excuses is easier than tying my shoes.
  • It's too cold to run.
  • It's too hot to run.
  • It looks like rain out there.
  • I just ate.
  • I haven't eaten anything all day.
  • My toe hurts.
  • My finger hurts.
  • My mother might call.
Blah, blah, blah.

The only way to fight excuses, I've discovered, is with excuses (sort of the fighting fire with fire philosophy). I've got to come up with excuses to run.

My current excuse to run is socks. Yes, you read that correctly, it's socks. Running socks.

Running hurts my feet and I've thought all along that if I could just find a good pair of cushiony socks, my feet would not complain so much. So now I'm running for the sole purpose of identifying the perfect pair of running socks. That's my excuse to just do it.

Who knows what will happen once I find those socks. Probably more excuses.

Monday, January 17, 2011

3 Tips for Surviving an Embarrassing Situation

Who hasn’t flirted with the cutest guy ever with a piece of pepper from lunch stuck in her front teeth or dropped a tampon on the checkout counter when pulling her wallet from her purse or asked the pharmacist to refill her “subscription.” We all experience highs brought down by discovery of our inadequacy. We all have accidents. We all say stupid things. And sometimes, in the midst of our mistakes, it can feel like the sky is falling and that we’ll never recover.


Really, how will we ever face the cutest guy again, knowing he saw that huge hunk of black pepper and didn’t say anything? Our imagination runs away with us. We imagine that he thought our front teeth were rotten, or that we’re so unattractive he didn’t think it was worth telling us we had something in our teeth. Oh the agony. Oh, how we duck our heads whenever we see him in the hallway. Oh, how we fear he’s laughing at us with his friends.

But embarrassing situations are survivable. It just takes some finesse.

1) First of all, stay calm. When that errant tampon drops and rolls across the checkout counter, don’t try to act like it isn’t yours. Don’t turn bright red and scramble to snatch it up, thus spilling the contents of your purse everywhere. Maintain your composure. Confidently pick it up and put it back in your purse as if it is a dime that got loose from your change purse.

2) Second, find some meaning in the situation. Learn a lesson of some sort. Maybe you need to resolve to brush your teeth after lunch. Maybe your purse needs a good purge. Maybe it’s a sign that your head is muddled up with too much information and you need a break from the routine. Whatever the message in the moment, listen to what the universe is trying to tell you.

3) Third, share it with someone. Telling another person about the experience makes it seem not so life altering. Relaying the story to a friend often makes us aware of the humor in it and the resulting laughter is very healing for the ego.

Apply these three principles and an embarrassing situation will never get you down again, at least not for long.

Lucy Adams is a newspaper humor columnist, freelance writer and author of Tuck Your Skirt in Your Panties and Run (Palm Tree Press, 2011) and If Mama Don’t Laugh It Ain’t Funny (Palm Tree Press, 2007). E-mail Lucy at lucybgoosey@aol.com and visit her web site, http://www.ifmama.com/.)  

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

What are We Doing This For?

The entire time I trained for my December 5K, which I didn't really want to train for, but had to because I'd made a public statement, I cussed and complained. I wallowed in self-pity. Most of all, I spent the half hour or torture distracting myself with composing what I would later post on FaceBook about my training that day. AND I wished for a broken ankle so that I would have an excuse not to train anymore and not to run the 5K. The whole mess I got myself into, all for cute running clothes, was sick and sordid.

BUT, I did not break my ankle. Therefore, I did run the 5K, something I never would have done had I not made it my goal. Heck, I never would have run 5 feet if I hadn't had a goal of some sort. For girls like me, it just isn't possible to get up our go without a carrot on a stick.

Someone recently accused me of becoming a recreational runner, meaning a person who goes out and jogs three miles for the heck of it. Puh-leeease.

He said that running is good therapy. I said I prefer chocolate therapy and wine therapy over sweating.

He reluctantly agreed that those are good, too.

So, it's time for a new motivator, because I can't go out there and run the streets for nothing. There has to be a destination, otherwise I'm doing it for nothing like any old recreational runner would. Ugh.

What are we doing this for?

(Lucy Adams is the author of Tuck Your Skirt in Your Panties and Run and If Mama Don't Laugh, It Ain't Funny.)

Monday, January 10, 2011

Gather the Girls

It's Time to Gather the Girls

Join Lucy in Savannah, Georgia for the 2011 Southern Women's Show February 4-6 at the Savannah International Trade and Convention Center.

Lucy will be on the Conversation Stage February 4th at 11:30am and 5:30pm on Friday, February 4th talking about her new book, Tuck Your Skirt in Your Panties and Run, released January 3rd. Hear true tales of a southern girl's misfortunes, mishaps, missteps and mistakes. Plus, Lucy will share her three tips for surviving an embarrassing situation.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

The Two Things

I can't say much about running. I'll never be the one cramming it down another person's throat and telling her how great it is and how much she'll love it and all about that runner's high bit. Running just isn't all that and that's the honest truth.

Nonetheless, there are two things I like about running.
  1. Thinking about running - I simply adore the idea of it. The picture in my mind of me in my snappy jogging outfit with my peppy ponytail swinging makes me happy. The thought of my heart pumping and my muscles working is exhilarating. Thinking about running is one of the best things about it, aside from the clothes.
  2. Finishing a run - What's better than being done and marking it off the list?
All the other stuff in between those two things, well, that stuff is all torture. Don't ever let anyone tell you any different. If it weren't torture, then everyone would be out running. The streets and sidewalks and trails would be so crowded with runners, I'd have to go at midnight just to have enough room to run. And if running was something everyone did, then what would be the sense of accomplishment in doing it myself?

That's something to think about.

Monday, January 3, 2011

It's Here! It's Here!

Tuck Your Skirt in Your Panties and Run
Full Realease Today

Buy your copy, plus copies for your mother, mother-in-law, sister, sister-in-law, cousin, best friend and casual acquaintance here:

Or puchase signed copies here: